Please raise your hand if you—like me—watched The Devil Wears Prada at an impressionable age and felt both scared and excited by the job Andy (Anne Hathaway) held. Note that everyone is raising their hands. Something was compelling about how Andy got this job that millions of girls would die for right out of college. Or how Miranda (Meryl Streep) was a powerhouse of a businesswoman and an excellent mentor. Or maybe it was how accessible the Chanel boots were.
Whatever the reason, watching that movie glamorized running down busy streets, carrying your boss’s coffee, dressed head to toe in couture. So here is how you, too, can feel like you are a magazine mogul’s stressed assistant even though you work in digital marketing and there is zero likelihood your boss will offer you a trip to Paris.
1. The City
You must live in a City. Capital C. There must be at least four tall buildings that you can frame in a selfie behind you to give the illusion of New York City. If you do not live in the City, fall in love with your commute (here is a recommendation for music for the drive: The Devil Wears Prada soundtrack), but park far away so you have more time to strut the sidewalks (and because finding parking any closer isn’t possible).
2. The Clothes
If you are working in digital marketing, you likely cannot shop straight from Gucci and Prada 24/7, 365. If you have a moderately healthy budget, shop resellers like Depop or Poshmark (or the RealReal, if your budget will live to the age of 110). If you are on the more frugal end, thrift stores and Goodwill are your best friends. You can find high-end dupes at low prices (and often a little better quality—even if they come pre-loved).
3. The Coffee
I know—not everyone drinks coffee, not everyone likes coffee, and not everyone wants to microdose on an addictive substance five days a week (blah blah blah). I hear you loud and clear. But carrying a coffee-esque cup around adds to the illusion that you are late. Plus, if you are nervous about pretending your midwest City of Cleveland is NYC, having a prop can really help.
4. The Walk
Wear comfy shoes or—if you are daring—those cute pumps from TJ Maxx that give you blisters but make you feel powerful. Walk fast, wear sunglasses, and call your mom, but say things like, “Look, I needed those files yesterday, so get them to me today, or it will be your ass on the line” (even if the files you are talking about are your old essays from high school that you are refitting for writing samples).
5. The Weak Boyfriend
An insecure paramour who is jealous of your Big Girl Job is one of the most important elements to solidifying your DWP life. When you work in digital marketing, it is a little tricky to blame missing your boyfriend’s birthday on New York Fashion Week. Lucky for you, most men are already a little insecure, especially if you make more money than them. Work your tail off, get a raise or two, and see if he does not say something like, “I wouldn’t care if you were out pole dancing all night, as long as you did it with a little integrity!” or something equally heinous.
This would give you the perfect excuse to break up and then start your new journey of emulating Gina Rodriguez from Someone Great (also set in NYC, so you are halfway there). Good luck out there, and happy posturing!
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